Winston Salem church of Christ

Darkness descends upon my soul. “It” is here again. Hope disappears; today brings despair. Why is it that whenever “It” intrudes, raising it’s monstrous head, the rest of my life seems almost totally worthless?

Realistically though, my one “It” is vastly outnumbered by hundreds, maybe even thousands of blessings. Dwelling on that thought, I feel better now!

Uh, oh, “It” is here again. I thought I had “It” conquered.

Maybe “It”isn’t the problem. Maybe it’s how I handle “It” Yeah, if I choose to quit indulging in self-pity and tunnel vision, I can conquer my own perception of “It”Whew, I’m glad that’s over. I feel better now!

Why!? Why can’t I have any lasting peace!? It’s another day, and “It” decides to visit. Life is not fair, sometimes. Months had past since “It” last disrupted and destroyed my mind and mood. Why can’t everything be the way it once was? “It”hates me. Maybe God hates me too. Why doesn’t He mercifully destroy “It”

The anger inside begins to reside. Recollections resurface of all the past times when “It” suddenly appeared and how I changed for the positive. Part of me is willing to forego all the resulting blessings such as patience, wisdom, sympathy, self-control and others if only “It”would disappear forever. And yet, with a sigh, resolutely I accept the existence of “It”Not only do I accept the existence of my troubles; I accept the growth, and even reluctantly bless the troublesome “It”Life is good again.

I awoke this morning with a cloud hanging over my head. Everything I see reminds me of “It”My soul cries; my eyes join in chorus. Hoping no one sees, I hurriedly pretend the sun breaks through this dark cloud. Pretending helps, but only a little. Deep inside, I still hurt. Years pass, “It” still tears the fabric of my happiness. I am getting tired of looking for the good, bright, and beautiful. “It” will probably be with me the rest of my life.

Today I woke up feeling better. “It” is still with me. And yet today I will survive:

“Therefore do not be anxious for tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Mt.6:34)

While it is hard, this is the only sane choice I have. Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow is not here. Today, with the Lord’s help, I can handle “It.”